My story

32 years old and he works as high-school chemistry teacher, moderator in the Christian TV channel LUX, dancer and director in the ATak theatre..

I am a gift. My mother was 45 when I was born. I was her first child. My father was 54 and proud of his lone descendant... I should never stop giving thanks to God for His plan that brought me to the earth. He wanted it – I have no doubts about it. Maybe, this is the reason why my vocation consists in giving myself to the others (as though I wished to repay the gift that I represented for my parents...). I want to be a gift even for my family, my colleagues, and students, for television and theatre spectators, and also for “random” passers-by, or readers-by, or listeners-by

I met God thanks to my mother. At time of my childhood I automatically accepted God as part of my life. First of all I met Him at church; later, during secret catechism meetings (which could ruin my future), and – after the revolution – even in a free and public dimension; today, I meet Him throughout the media and on the stage.

I think God likes to play and He has a good sense of humour... that’s why He is sometimes hidden. He wants us to find Him back, time and again. We will never be able to happily assert that we understand Him and that we found Him, because He is in Himself dynamics... and He likes to change our expectations. I discovered that He isn’t any bearded old man in a cloud, who created the world in six days and now he manipulates us as though we were puppets. I also discovered that He is not an invention of literates and philosophers. Similarly, I found out that He is not simply a psychological manoeuvre in case of problems and dramatic life breakthroughs.

I was relatively young when I discovered my artistic soul. I perceived what was going on round me throughout my own view. I wanted to touch people through movement, colour, light... even without words. I am sensitive towards pain, injustice, darkness. One of the things that always bothered me are sentences like: believers are an extinct species from Jurassic Park, odd fellows who don’t believe in evolution, don’t buy televisions, have sex only for reproductive purposes, and spend all their energy in fighting contraception, abortion, and euthanasia. Some of my classmates were not believers; and some of them looked happy... and I looked for an answer to a question: what do I need God for? They are happy (or at least it looks like that). No restrictions, no fear of punishment... I was angry with “official” Christians, who are just fulfilling some obligations, but they don’t have any idea of what – or rather Who – God is. I felt ashamed for them. They live in a sort of schizophrenia – at church they are good people. But what about out of church...? Moreover, it is very easy to condemn us:

Are you a Christian? Can you do that?!?

This epoch of exploding volcanoes inside me was marked by the light of the charisma of an Italian woman – Chiara Lubich. During World War 2 she lost everything. Together with her friends they had to forget about their dreams, family, studies, career, in the debris of the falling city of Trento. All they had with them was a small Gospel. The Word of God – that spoke to them once again in that nothingness. When everything is lost, He remains. Only Love. He is Love. You have to try it. Human word does not have such a power. I have had a chance to test it in several occasions. For everyone who asks receives... Give and it will be given to you... Forgive... Do good to those who hate you...

No needs to add more words. They would be just my words... human words... without strength. You wouldn’t have to necessarily trust them. But I write what I am always experiencing. Love shines also in the darkness – and in hatred too. It gives me joy, wings, smile. If I like those who are here with me, if I love them, it is not always so easy. To flee from our own person, to notice them, to listen to them, to lose time, sometimes even our own expectations... Paradoxically, in these moments I get relief, calm, joy, strength, ideas, creativity... Shocking solutions in unsolvable situations... Material goods where poverty reigns... For me they are all manifestations of God, of His Spirit. That’s why it is worth it. Just have a try. Nobody is giving me orders, because, when I infringe God’s laws, I find out by myself that I am causing harm to myself. Suddenly, I realize that it is completely normal to protect life since conception until natural death, that faith and science are not in contrast between them, and that donating oneself to another person with the whole body is a beautiful gift (and that’s why it should be offered only to our wife/husband – and not to anybody else anywhere else).

P.S.: This was just a feeble attempt to express with words something that was written inside me long time ago by a man who was very close to Jesus. His name was John and you will find it in – the third chapter of his first letter, verses 23 and 24.